Lesson 2: Ask Them to STOP
Quote: Asking Them to STOP tells them what you don’t like. It creates boundaries.
Statement: Children are often encouraged to tell someone to stop if they are being hurt, whether it be through conflict or bullying behaviours. In actual fact, this is one of the hardest skills to implement and does not always work for them, because it requires an understanding of a number of skills to implement correctly and also because a child cannot choose another person’s behaviour, only their own. However, it is very important that your child knows how to ask someone to stop, so they can be clear to communicate their boundaries.
Research: Dr Ken Rigby is a leading researcher from the University of South Australia and has provided valuable insights into bullying and destructive behaviours in schools. He states that to reduce such behaviour “In many cases, it’s just a matter of reminding [others] that what they are doing is not right.”
Tips to teach this skill at home:
1. Teach children to stand bravely. The biggest form of communication is their body language.
2. Demonstrate to your child the different tones or sounds their voice can make when asking someone to stop. It could be whiney, sarcastic, angry or frustrated. Using a calm, brave tone of voice is empowering.
3. Help them to think about the words they use. They need to be clear about what they want the person to stop.
4. Remind students to finish with the word “thanks” rather than “please”.
5. With your child, visit the BRIDGE BUILDERS Online Learning Program Lesson Two and do some of the fun activities as a family. Validating this learning empowers your child with valuable skills to learn how to; Ask Them to STOP and be empowered for life!
By Jocelyne Chirnside
Empowering Life Skills